A Simple Life

June 24^th, 2018

The Fam Bam at da Older Sis's Wedding Reception

Stepping off the plane in the Dubai airport it hit me and hit me hard. What is everyone doing? They’re all staring down at their screens!! How strange. I pass by a stranger and make eye contact, slow down, and greet them. They respond with an awkward head nod and keep walking. Daniel, come now, remember you’re no longer in Mozambique! You don’t talk to strangers here. And yes, I know we are aware of how our society is addicted to technology and the liking – so let me paint a picture.

No AC? No problem, that’s life. One sits outside under the shade of the Mango tree. And guess what your neighbours are doing? Sitting under the shade of their tree as well. So you chat. A man on a bike is passing by in the late afternoon clearly exhausted after his trip to the city. What does he do? Well, he walks up to your house and asks for a cup of water. You’ve never met him before and yet it’s not an awkward situation. It feels completely normal. You ask him about his health, his work, and his family. You share a polite conversation and he asks you about your kids so you have to explain that you actually don’t have any kids or a wife! He’s quite surprised and doesn’t quite understand. The conversation wraps up and he thanks you for the glass of water.

Strangers talk to strangers and it’s not awkward!! Until you get off the plane in Dubai or step onto US soil – then it becomes very awkward and strange quickly. I’m going to say something many of us already know and recognize. Life in the states moves fast. Constantly from one thing to the next. In Mozambique the only thing that matters is the current moment that one is living in. And yes I acknowledge that has some drawbacks when it comes to planning and preparing for the future. However, there is also a marvellous bliss in presence, in being able to acknowledge the strangers around you, in being able to go up to a random house and ask for a glass of water amidst having a warming conversation.

Not being socially allowed to strike up conversation with strangers is just one aspect that made my transition back to the states feel so strange. There’s also the Mozambicain handshake! It’s similar to the “bro-shake” but slightly different. And oh boy did I throw a lot of people off with it, whoops!! We’d be doing a normal “bro-shake” and then I’d go for the Mozambicain thumb flick and you could see it in their face “What is Daniel doing!?! Uhhhh this is weird” or the classic continue to hold hands for the next few minutes as you converse – I guess that’s also not normal in the states…

The first thing I recognized stepping onto US soil was the amount of concrete – everywhere. Concrete, concrete, concrete. Where’s the soil? Where’s the dirt I’m so used to walking on? Where’s all of the life? Yes there are some trees around and road dividers with grass and plants. But Americans even walk on concrete sidewalks! Strange. Who would want to walk on concrete when you could walk on soil/dirt/sand?

Walking into a grocery store, I took a double take and had to slow down. Too much. There’s just too much stuff here. Where does it all come from? Who’s making all of the boxes and plastic everything is packaged in? Why are the peppers and tomatoes so abnormally big? How does a mango cost 1 USD!?! I can buy 12 for that price back in Moz!! And why are there gallons upon gallons upon gallons of milk all being stored in fridges….? And who needs 50 different choices of BBQ sauces? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen! 50?? Like why?

Living in excess influences people. Living in extreme poverty also influences people.  One lifestyle removes you from the earth and from day to day life. The other has you only living in the day, forever unprepared for tomorrow. I won’t claim to know where the balance or solution lies – I’m still learning.

I’m incredibly grateful I was able to return to the states to support my sister and her new husband in their marriage! It was my first time back in 21-22 months. Living in extreme poverty has affected me – probably both for better and for worse. It’ll take me sometime to sort it all out. I can say I’ve learned how to appreciate the little things like pleasant conversation, not having to worry about water, and constantly having energy. I’ve also learned how to take things in stride. Serving in the Peace Corps, I have grown in my ability to adapt, grow, love, and be resilient to the curveballs of life. I’m finding that it takes a lot to be thrown off my game.

To be fair – the last two weeks have been incredibly emotionally challenging but that’ll be for a future blog post!

I’ve grown in my ability to just spend time with people without needing to be doing anything. I’ve grown in my ability to compliment people for what they do well and to state the things I appreciate about them. I’m better abled to stand up for myself and speak out when something frustrates me. Overall, I’d like to think I’m a simpler person or at least I have much simpler needs. Just the pleasure of a hot shower makes my heart sing! Or having learned how to bypass the awkwardness and strike up random conversation with nearly anyone (hint, hint even in the states in can be done! What I’ve learned is that in your approach and first 5 seconds you need to make the stranger feel comfortable). Being able to cook at any moment is truly amazing – no need to light charcoal.

All in all, since the majority of my readers are Americans: may we be more intentional with how we walk through life day to day. Planning and forward thinking is important – but it is not worth sacrificing life to achieve it, and remember life can only be lived and experienced in the present moment. But don't just remember that, do something about it! Invite a random neighbor over for dinner. I dare you.

One last pro-tip (but I am no pro so take it as you would a grain of salt): it is much easier to be happy when living a simple life. 

With all my heart,

Daniel Bladow